Incepted

My first deva therapy session was a powerful and traumatic one. So much so that deep inside I'm a little afraid of what the second session might bring.


My subconscious mind showed me these...

Peace. A green field on top of a mountain. I'm facing snowcapped mountains in the distance. My arms are wide open, my head thrown back, I'm smiling and soaking in the sunlight. There's a light breeze and I feel it in my fingers and hair.


I'm feeling free and my mind is blank.


Higher self. Small dim round light, very far away. Can't reach it, can barely see it there. It comes nearer and then goes away. My mind is blank. The light transforms into a candlelight flame.


I see R's face. Soft and transculent, peaceful and calm. 


What message does she have for you? She says: "Do not be afraid of falling. Learn to love yourself."


Suddenly I'm standing next to grey concrete wall. The wall is on my left. I'm jumping up and down, trying to reach her hand. She's reaching down but I can't touch her anymore as the wall gets higher and higher.


I start to panic. I feel desperate.


When was the last time you felt this? Flashback at East Coast Park. We're facing the sea in the darkness. All I see is your backview. You're talking about separating. I start to panic and feel desperate.


Go back further in time. 


2002: South Yarra apartment. Housesitting for P and her friend (I don't remember his name) is housesitting with me. 


[I will not relate the episode here]



Scared. I locked all balcony doors, switched off all lights, switched on small lamp (far from
window), lay in bed, started crying – cried for very long – cried the next day, still in bed, slept
entire day. I didn’t switch on the light at night.  Looked out of the window for his car. I didn’t call or
message anyone – hid in house for two days.


Where is this memory stored? In my stomach.


Heal: White flat light coming to me like cross-section. Big Bang, huge circle of light – expands out in
great force.


Disgust: Blue fish wriggling around. 


Release it into the ocean of compassion and forgiveness. Fill the stomach with the ocean.


Visualise his face: I've forgotten his face but it reappears. He's standing against a white light. Another white light is shining on the right side of his face from the bottom.


What do you want to tell him? Nothing. What are you doing? Smiling at him. I have nothing to say.


He dissolves into the white light. The white light is healing my stomach.


R's face appears again. She says: "Take care."

###

I can't believe you've incepted my subconsciousness.