Must age gracefully...must.

The sad reality about getting older is that as we age, we look more and more haggard. I look at the people around me and I see their faces slowly being etched with life's experiences. I look in the mirror daily, watching tiny wrinkles developing near my eyes. Instead of willing them away, I tell myself that each wrinkle is there because of the amount of laughter I've had in my life.

Then I start scrutinising my neck coz I feel that it's getting drier recently no matter how much I moisturise. Sigh.

And no CE, my eyes weren't bigger last time and I wasn't prettier last time. :( I look...the same. Just a bit more tired, that's all.

I know I'm mentally preparing myself for the Big 3, having just passed my 28th birthday. I've spoken to many people about the Big 3 and I guess the only consolation I have now is that I'll be spending it in the States with Bam, so maybe I'll be less depressed coz ...it's slower by a day? :D

Despite all that, I had a fantastic 28th birthday celebration, mainly because of the company I had that night. It was a crazy karaoke session, thanks to Ju and some crazy-minded girls. I'm glad everyone got along well.

Somehow, presents came in pairs this year: two birthday balloons, two boxes of chocolates and two book-related gifts. A big thanks for the Borders voucher and book. They know me so well. Am I really the bookworm I perceive to be?

And the special present, the odd-one-out of the lot has to be, of course, from the Small One (she just had to be special, didn't she?). Thank you my baby for your present. :) You must have been really observant to figure out what I wanted all this while and yes, I do love it.

On the 12th itself, I woke up with a splitting headache after only three hours of sleep (alcohol-infused sleep is bad). Had a nice conversation with Moo before I was dragged out of bed for brunch. I miss her so much!

With me looking a tad pasty, we made our way under the hot sun to Dempsey. I wanted to eat at Jones The Grocer but it was packed to the brim, so we ventured to the empty Prime Society, where I feasted on Wagyu sausages and they had steak and egg.


Birthday dinner was at Broth (coz I so wanted the pavlova!) with the Small One:


*burp* I really think I ate too much that day. I was truly happy because I spent time with my loved ones in Singapore and on the phone with those who are in Australia.

Truth be told, I've forgotten how it's like to be young, clueless and with no direction whatsoever. Sheren and CE told me I should be reminded of my youth now that my gf is so much younger, but no, it's not true! In contrast, it reminds me of how OLD I am.

I remember I faced a huge (it was huge to me at that time) decision just before graduating. I didn't know if I wanted to stay in Melbourne or return to Singapore. This dilemma, I know, is one which a lot of people face.

And I suppose someone else decided for me. Not to say that I regretted anything, in fact, I'm glad I ended up working here because of the jobs I managed to get. I'm glad I got into journalism coz not only do I enjoy it, I can now work on expanding my career within this profession.

So, I really don't know how to advise you on your life because I stumbled upon mine by chance and impulse without much thought being given to it. I suppose that's the beauty of life - it brings you plenty of surprises when you least expect it and when you never had any plans at all. So don't worry too much; things happen for a reason and life has its own way of sorting itself out. You just need to pay attention to the people who are by your side when you go through the rough patches.

In hindsight, at the age of 20, I was absolutely clueless...

At 22, I thought I knew what I wanted with love and life...I attempted to make plans and I thought everything was so easy.

At 24, my life changed coz of one drastic decision. I entered the workforce by accident. I also learned that love alone is not enough.

At 26, I was truly happy. I understood what a good relationship entailed, I found love again, I travelled lots, I picked up tennis and I almost drowned.

And now at the age of 28, I'm in the midst of my masters, I already know what to learn when I'm done with that, I'm enjoying what I'm doing and I've made plans to take my career further coz I want to do more.

But I'm still lost...in certain ways I am still that 22-year-old girl who loves to be romanced yet clueless about love.

I'm still that 22-year-old who clings on to her skeptical, cynical and negative side.

I'm still the same weight, I still bicker with my mum (but over different things now). I still smoke (sigh), I still club (though lesser), I still break peoples' hearts and I still get my heart broken.

I'm still the 22-year-old who wished things were simpler. I'm still the girl who has plenty of fears.

Come to think of it, my friends from then are still my close friends today and this is something I treasure more than life itself.

I was chatting with CE the entire night (although I was supposed to be reading my notes) and I realised from the conversation, from some topic we were talking about, that I progress at a rather rapid rate. I get bored easily and nothing keeps me occupied for long. I need change, I need challenges.

Maybe that's why my life changes so drastically every three years or so.

Now that I have two more years before I reach the Big 3, I think I'll just spend my time enjoying myself coz when I reach the age of 30, I hope I can look back at my 20s and say: "I think I've laid my foundation right. So bring it on."

But in the meantime....I must age gracefully...I must, I must.

*goes and does her mask routine*